Read part one of this post by clicking here.
The second thing I did as a single parent was: remind myself of my identity in Christ.
There’s a big difference between who you are in yourself and who you are in Christ. The first book of Ephesians talks about our Identity in Christ. Ephesians 1:3 (NIV) says, “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.” In and of ourselves, we are nothing. In Him, you and I are complete, lacking in nothing. Complete means: satisfied, finished, perfected, filled up, assured, confident, secure. Ephesians 1:4 says, “For he chose us in Him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight.” If we know who we are in Christ, what you are or what you lack doesn’t matter anymore.
When we remind ourselves that in Christ we are LOVED, we are SAFE, we are IMPORTANT, our attitudes and our actions are changed and rearranged. Ephesians 1: 7 says, “In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding.” This concept of God’s unconditional love has ministered to me especially during days I couldn’t love myself or my circumstances.
The third thing I did as a single parent was: reach out with God’s love language—prayer.
Practice God’s presence; there is power in prayer. My children were hurting badly. Their father has died and so had part of their future. Their situation would be permanent. No one could replace their father. This was a hard one for me. I began to pray without ceasing.
I recommend you join with at least one good friend (single women with other women) to pray for your children. I use the Moms in Prayer method to pray for my children. Use God’s prayer book, the Bible, to help you enter into praise, confession, thanksgiving, and intercession.
Isaiah 54:4 (NIV) says, “Do not be afraid, you will not be put to shame. Do not fear disgrace, you will not be humiliated you will forget the shame of your youth and remember no more the reproach (disappointment) of your widowhood.”
I asked God to be my children’s Father. I studied single parents in the Bible, and I noticed they all had one thing in common. They knew God’s word and went to God to meet their needs.
One of my favorite single parents is found in 2 Kings 4—the widow who couldn’t provide for her two sons. God’s answer was found in a little pot of oil. When the prophet asked the widow, “What do you have in your house?” she said, “Nothing except a small jar of oil.” He replied, “Go ask your neighbors for empty jars, don’t just ask for a few. Go in your house, shut your door, just you and your sons.” They brought the jars to their mother and she kept pouring. When all the jars were full, she said to her son, bring me another one. But he replied, “There is not a jar left.” Then the oil stopped flowing. She went and told the man of God. He said, “Go sell the oil, pay your debts, you and your sons can live on what is left.” God wants us to trust Him to meet every single one of our needs. When we do this, it speaks volumes to our children. God will take care of them in the same way He takes care of us.
My prayer for you is found in Ephesians 1:17–18:
“I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people and his incomparable great power for us who believe.” In Jesus’s name, amen.
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